Kate McKay

The Two Words that Will Change your Life: It’s Radical!

January 18, 2019

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Your overall approach to how to view your health and well-being matters, but what matters even more is WHAT you focus on. How do you define your own personal success and happiness? And more importantly, are you living it?

Many people define their success by making a to-do list and marking items off, no matter the degree of importance. And while many of us are extremely busy, the true question is are you accomplishing what matters the most in order for you to have a happy and fulfilling life?

For many, keeping busy and running around like a chicken with their head cut off is a cover really focusing on what is most important in one’s life: your own personal health and well-being and the wealth of the relationships around you. Because at the end of the day, these are the values that truly matters most. Because without our health and the richness of relationships life can seem, well, pretty lackluster.

What I have found as a coach is that the clients who achieve the most success, are those who focus on the tasks and activities that will give them the biggest bang for their buck. They have decided they want a better life, so they bring me on board to help them get there. Because the truth is, even the Lone Ranger had Tonto.

You want to have an amazing life?  If the answer is yes, it’s time to first, get real on what you want. And second, start to put yourself into the equation by being honest with yourself and others around you as to what you want in your life. Then, lastly, set your days, weeks and months by radically prioritizing your time around attaining the lifestyle you desire and deserve. These two words, radical prioritization, once consistently applied, are guaranteed game-changers.

Word of caution: When you decide to make yourself a priority, trust me, you’re going to get all kinds of feedback from not only people around you, but even more powerfully from the voices in your head that play dirty tricks on you. 

“Who do you think you are?” What do you think, you’re special?” “People who focus on themselves are selfish.” “You should put  others peoples needs (your kids, your spouse, your parents) in front of your own.” “I don’t deserve it. I haven’t worked hard enough, sacrificed enough, suffered enough….” Baloney!!!

My clients who are the most successful, no matter if they are developing a business idea, leaving a toxic relationship to find the love of their life, building a healthy body, or letting go of self-sabotaging patterns and behaviors, all attain the greatest amount of success by finally being clear on 1. WHY they want to make the change 2.ACCEPTING that they deserve it, then finally 3. RADICALLY PRIORITIZING the action steps to enthusiastically accomplish their goals.

Is this path to transformation paved with daisies, bon-bons and rainbows?

Heck, no! 

Will there be days when you want to jump ship and go back to your days of running around like a maniac and then ending up at the end of the day on the couch, binging on ice cream chip and bad tv?

Sure, enough.

However, once you decide that you have a clear purpose- a big and juicy “WHY” you would like to attain your ultimate vision and goals for yourself, with the right support and action steps, you will become unstoppable to attain what your heart desires.

And how do I know this is true with such conviction?

In October of this year, I experienced any parents worst possible nightmare. My beautiful son Will took his own life in the the White Mountains. I was devastated. All those who knew and loved Will were and many still are devastated. But what I know for sure, with absolute certainty, is that Will would not want me or any of those who loved him to suffer. Yes, grief and loss is a heavy load to carry, however, suffering, I believe is optional.

So many of us have experience trials and tribulations in our life. I understand this and have deep compassion for others struggles. However, because of my own personal experience with loss, and the gift of my work in being with people through their own struggles, I am now, more than ever, committed to helping others attain the freedom and the joy of living an exceptional life.

Ready to apply the principles of radical prioritization? With the assistance of Francee Quinlan, Life Strategist, and owner of Ducks in a Row Design, we have compiled the following principles you can start applying today.

  1. Make a list the night before of things you MUST accomplish the next day. If you know you won’t get to your workout if you wait until later in the day, do it first thing upon arising. Sleep in your workout clothes if you have to. (Trust me I have done it!)  Plan your meals and commit to feeding what fuels you. Do tough conversations need to be had? Get it done and end the hash-overs. The things on the list are your must-do’s not your somedays. Put some days on another page so you don’t get tempted to fall off track.

  2. At the end of the day, assess what you accomplished. Celebrate your wins and please don’t beat yourself up over the failures. Tomorrow is a new day. Leave yesterday’s drama behind you. Self-flagellation is a complete-time waste. Please stop that. 🙂

  3. Set realistic goals as to how long things are going to take. Ouch! This is a tough one for many of us, so lean on people to hold you accountable to stick to a plan. Hire a coach, trainer, use a timer, build in a 15-minute window on appointments, etc. This is a huge pressure relief to not be under the gun all the time. Take that stress off your plate. Be realistic on what you can do. Do what you can, work efficiently, and take what you learned and pay it forward. You got this!

  4. Organize your space to feel more efficient so prioritization because easier. Successful people organize their life around their purpose. Want to be a fit person? What area in your home or car needs to be organized so your fitness is automatic? How can you re-organize your cabinets, your shopping trips to make eating clean and healthy automatic? Bedroom look like an episode from Storage Wars? How are you welcoming in a new love relationship in that present condition? Money jammed in your wallet and receipts everywhere? Set a timer and spend 15 minutes in these areas and watch your life and attitude shift for the better.

  5. Make yourself a ruthless priority. Silence the inner critic. Forgive yourself for past failures. The good news is when we know better, we can choose to do better. 

And remember, at the end of the day, the 3 most important questions we can ask ourselves are the following:

  1. Did I do my best?

  2. Is there anyone I need to forgive? Do I need to forgive myself for anything?

  3. Was I loving and kind to myself and others?

Tomorrow is a new day. Let’s live in the hope and understanding that we all can make a difference. By putting yourself in the equation and living a life of radical prioritizing, you really can change your life and the life of others for the better.

I want to thank my community for the loving kindness you so generously offered me and my family through the loss of Will. I am deeply grateful.

Thank you.

Love always,