Kate McKay

3 Steps on How YOU Can Be More Confident

June 3, 2019

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You set your sights on attaining a goal, whether its achieving a fitness or dietary change, a new job, finding a great relationships or any other dream that excites you, and within days, even minutes sometimes, your resolve wanes. What happened? And why is it that some people seem to be crushing their goals, while others continue to flounder? The difference is often a result on the presence or lack of a confident and successful mindset. Successful people are confident in their ability to succeed, while those with less confidence, plan to fail, instead of assuming the win.

Want to learn the winning strategies on how to become a success magnet and give your negative thinking the heave-ho? 

Great, I thought so!

Start applying these strategies below to boost your confidence and ensure greater success in any and all areas of your life. The key is that your desire to win at life is greater than your desire to play it safe in your comfort zone. Are you ready to bust out? Check out these strategies for greater confidence and success:

  1. Embrace feeling uncomfortable.  No one starts out of the gates being an expert at life. It takes practice and lots of failures to be successful. A confident mindset means approaching opportunities with a belief that things will work out in your favor. Be prepared to lean into the unknown, ask lots of questions and surround yourself with experts in the field to which you desire to excel in or people who also seek new opportunities for growth. You want to get fit? Join a gym where you are around other people who are committed to same goals. Want a more challenging career? Network in places where people go who have your dream job, Same thing with wanting a new relationship.       Put yourself in places where interesting people mingle. Hire a coach or find a mentor to help you bridge your knowledge and courage gap. Will you feel uncomfortable? Most likely. But remember, growth does not happen in your comfort zone. If you want to grow, find a place where people are growing!

  2. Assume Your Success. Going into a new situation with reservations makes your thinking turn to the defense, thereby limiting your ability to act boldly. How to break this negative thinking pattern? Plan for a YES. Visualize yourself attaining your goals and receiving a positive response through any given scenario. By affirming a positive result, you are far more likely to attain what you want. Being a more positive person also goes hand in hand with having a more resilient spirit. And nothing beats getting through tough times than with resiliency, the ability to pick yourself up after a fall, absorb the lesson of the loss or failure and apply the lesson in a positive light going forward in your life. Being positive doesn’t mean you don’t think bad things happen; it just means that you choose to focus on the lesson and the blessing. And doesn’t every opportunity have even a kernel of that?

  3. Rewrite the Story. It’s so easy to come up with excuses why we can’t do something, isn’t it? This is especially true  when our energy and willpower fades. A great way to boost our confidence and conviction for success is to substitute the word “but” with the word “and” when we are thinking or speaking about our goals. Here’s how this works: let’s use the following examples: “I would like to lose 10 pounds, but…..”  Or  “I really want to look for a new job/relationship but…..” What often comes after a “but” is the negative reasons why we CAN’T attain our goal, so we are actually programming failure with our own words and thought patterns!  Yikes! 

Now, let’s try switching the word “but” for “and” and see how that changes up the sentence to be more affirming and action-focused. Try this by writing out your own goals and see if you can uncover your roadblocks and also new pathways to attain your goals. Then start applying them. Success is a marathon, not a sprint. Taking small steps daily with positive expectancy is a sure shot to attaining your greatest hopes and dreams.

Your words- how you talk about yourself and your goals- directly influence your positivity and success. In fact, much of my work as a coach and trainer is helping people re-language the way they speak about themselves. By using humor and grace to mirror others self-defeating language, I have seen the powerful effect on the success of my clients attaining their goals and their overall higher state of wellbeing.  Tune in to how both you and the people around you  talk about themselves and others. Words have the power to wound or to heal. Let’s work together as a community to create a more loving and supportive environment for growth. Never underestimate the power that kind and supportive words and a smile can have on others. You literally have the power to change a life for the better, one smile at a time.